Wednesday, 9 March 2011

Sleeping's Massively Overrated Anyway...

For some peculiar reason, in recent weeks there has been a fire alarm bonanza in Cranborne. Any time of day or night seems fine, but it's becoming inevitable that we'll have to evacuate our home at least once a week or - as it was a few weeks ago - five times in four days.

The increasing dullness and frustration that each fire alarm brings, I feel, cannot be healthy - the howling sound that once cut through me, alerting me to the possibility of a life-threatening danger, has become a screech that batters my ears and fails to excite any adrenaline in me whatsoever.



One early morning this spiteful little alarm didn't even manage to stir me from my bed - I awoke in the morning with a vague memory of something happening - my subconscious seemingly made the decision for me to simply ignore the so-called warning, and my innocent being was left in the firing line for danger.

This brings me nicely onto my next, and main, point. I would like to extend a plea to anyone and everyone who might set off a fire alarm to cease. Not only because my usual sleeping patterns are being monstrously disrupted, but also because my future safety is being throw into harm's way. If, at any point in my life, I am damaged by fire I will have no choice but to blame every one of the cretins who has set off an alarm in my current home.

I feel I cannot merely send out this plea selfishly, although that is the main reason I'm doing this, as we usually have at least two fire engine attending the little ceremony in the car park. It is not uncommon for four of these machines to turn up, loaded with firemen ready to save us - although from the look of most of them, getting up to my 7th floor flat, bursting through an inferno, locked doors and all manner of danger, finding me and transporting safely back down the 112 stairs to terra firma would be out of the question. They seem far more content sitting uselessly in their fire engine as the imaginary fire tears through Cranborne and its residents are all safely downstairs already.

Regardless of firemen's beer bellies and my imminent burning to death, I would like nothing more than for these alarms to stop. I need my sleep!

Good day

No comments:

Post a Comment